DO PEOPLE JUST DIE? -The Search For Answers

"Oheneba, you have a call" a colleague called from the nurses' station. I ran out of the other room but I guess I wasn't fast enough, I had missed it. It was Mum! I checked the time, and it was few minutes past 10 in the morning. Mum wouldn't call around this time unless she knew I had an off-day. I remembered! I had actually missed her calls earlier that night when the heavy rains put me to a long sleep. "What could be it?" I muttered. I dialed her number and MTN's favourite 'you have no call credit in your MTN account' was at the receiving end. But how?  I wasn't ready for MTN's 'antics' today. I definitely was going to get back at them. I only need to get through to my Mum first. I recharged then called again. She didn't pick up but called back instead.

And "Hello", "Yes" was what I received from the other side. And that wasn't even Mum but kid Sis. "Ahhhh, as3m b3n?" to wit, "What is it?" I asked. She probably didn't like this 'pleasantry-free' response but I wasn't in her 'elements'. I was expecting my Mum and not her. "Bro Afrane is not well.." she began but realised she's not got much details and so hands phone over to my Mum. I probably had asked "How or Why?" before my Mum came on to chip in a response. "Oh Kwadwo, we were called yesterday that he's been rushed to the hospital at Agogo" she started. "Your Dad left for the hospital this morning and his report isn't encouraging" she said in a low tone. "But how, why, and what was wrong with him?" I asked as though I was assessing a patient on admission. I was confused and didn't know what to ask first. "I'm even unable to reach your Dad at the moment..." "Aduse, don't forget to document the consumables for the surgery", my In-Charge interrupted before she could finish that line. So the call had to end. And yes, right there on the Theatre bed, a patient had undergone a CS for her tenth child. I had to forget about the call and be sure I was recording the right sutures and other consumables used for the procedure.

Back in my room after work, I decided to call Mum after I had called MTN's office for answers to my 'missing' credits. A guy answered the 100 toll-free line. He said those were deductions from subscriptions - subscriptions I was clueless about. Interesting! So Mum picked up and continued the story. So it wasn't all bad news for the day. My sister had passed her WASSCE. I felt sorry for my reaction to her earlier. She probably might have been excited to bring her good news to her 'big bro' only to get an 'as3m b3n' response. I needed to make it up with her. Back to my brother, he wasn't doing any better, Mum has said. Amoako, a friend, comes in to tell me about a guest we're expecting the next day and the need to get things sorted out.

So it's morning, and there's no work. It was going to call Dad to ask about how the second of his six 'kids' was doing when a call came through. It was a friend and we got talking for long because it had been a while we heard from each other. I checked the time and 'oops',  I was running late. The guest would be in soon and I hadn't even been to the market yet. In a bit and I was back from the market. I was almost set when Amoako came in with the guest. I was late!🤦🏾‍♂ But I could explain. I had been delayed at the Bank (in the name of slow network) before heading to the market. Just when I thought I had to hurry, looking at the meat, I realized I could make some soup in addition to the stew. Hehe, but yeah, it had been a while I got something 'soupy' down my throat since I sent my fridge for repairs so it wasn't such a bad idea. Besides, the burners were two and so I could do them simultaneously. Fast forward, both stew and soup are ready and we treated ourselves to some 'yams' with the stew.

I might have forgotten all about calling Dad while I had to attend to our visitor. I was few minutes past five in the evening. I called Dad, he answered and then we exchanged pleasantries. "Ahaa, so how's Bro Kwame doing now?" I asked. "Kwadwo, we've lost him!" my Dad let it out simply. "Ah! Was something wrong with my Dad?", I might have asked. I wasn't talking about his brother Kwame. I was asking about MY brother, Kwame. The Strong, Healthy Kwame who had sent him, my Dad, to the hospital when he was unwell few weeks ago. But yeah, it was the same Kwame Dad was talking about. "Ah but how?" "DO PEOPLE JUST DIE?" "How could he have died?" I was asking too many questions which probably didn't have answers. "It's happened Kwadwo, and you've got to be strong" I heard my Dad say. "Boat called a while ago and we've told him too" he added. I was speechless.

Hmmmm, the irony of life. Death has become so unfair that now the Older Folks rather have to encourage the younger ones to be strong. And my brother had called in from outside the country earlier because he had heard the news and here I was in New Edubiase - a few kilometres from home - thinking all 'soupy', clueless about the death of my brother. Interesting! Just before the call ended, I thought I heard someone's cry. And yes, "it's your Mum" he confirmed. Reality dawned on me. I have never known metabolism to be this fast. The food I took just a while ago had left me. I was suddenly empty again. The news wasn't making sense to me and I had a lot of unanswered questions but who had answers? I scrolled through my phone's gallery to find his picture and there he was looking all strong. He probably wasn't looking forward for this but this is all 2nd and 3rd August 2017 had to offer to the Nimako's.

The Nimakos...The Rest of us without you. 

The thought of the woman on the Theatre bed came back again. I remembered when the baby was pulled out of her uterus and made his first cry. It was painful and yet exciting perhaps for the mother. Her 'baby-last' was here to add to the league of her already nine kids. He probably had said "I will take care of you, Mom" when he was showed to his Mother. I could imagine my brother saying similarly to my Dad when the latter laid on his hospital bed some few weeks ago. He might have said some other reassuring things too. But here was my Dad looking all strong and asking that I be strong too. Here he was thinking of how to put to rest a Son whose duty it was to ensure the rest of us were doing well while he, Dad, was gone.

I had left home to play my role in saving lives in a faraway hospital and yet my blood brother wrestled with death on a hospital bed and lost. The more I thought of his wife, the more fear gripped me. My biggest fear now looked at me in the eyes. I had feared how life would be for young kids without their fathers but there in her room were her under-ten years kids who probably are clueless about why their Mum was wailing. "Daddy had only told them he was going to school to teach but why was Mummy crying if he's not been home for only two days? He probably had got lots of markings to do since school was going on recess" the older of the two might have reasoned. But that is it! The thoughts of a child - so free and assuring, full of hope. How then do we break the news of Bro's final goodbye to this child who believes his Dad is coming back tomorrow or the week after? It's sad!😞

Coach with his kids 

It's only been days after your journey without goodbyes but I just can't be cool. There are a whole lot of questions I have to ask. The soup doesn't even smell good anymore. Nothing does! Everything is a waste now. But for Mum and Dad, I will be strong! Yeah, I will be strong so that they find a reason to be thankful for life. Hey Kwame, we've got things to talk about but I wouldn't want to disturb your peaceful rest. You would have to explain where you learned to leave your family without a message- Daddy never taught us that. Find answers to this and all the other questions before we meet again.

It's a hard time but I find solace in your Word, Lord. You assured me in your Word, "not to fear, for you're with me". Norman Cousins was right, "Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live". And so yes! There's a time for everything on the earth. Just like the cry of new birth so there is another cry for the death of a beloved. Take the moment and have a retrospection, if you died today, would your life be celebrated?

Death is shocking regardless of the state the deceased person was in before his or her death. Whether it's timely or untimely, we may never get to know but life must go on. The death of a beloved should not 'kill' us. I believe it should rather prepare us for our own time. The quest for the why's won't yield any difference in the 'life' of the deceased person but rather may bring more pain to the bereaved. Whether good or bad, people die - any everyone else would. Remembering that one day you will also die should be the most important tool to help you make the big choices in life. Because almost everything - the material things, the pride, the fear, the expectations and dreams- these things just fall away in the face of death.

I would thus trust your Word, Lord and not lose faith, knowing that all things work for the good of those that trust in You. I may not understand it but I believe You know best. Lord, keep my brother safe in your Paradise till we meet again.

Coach, when it gets crowded up there, do leave a place for me. Until then fare thee well Emmanuel Opoku Afrane aka Coach

Damirifa Due!
Rest Well Brother!

Oheneba Writes
(Tribute to my Brother😥)

Oheneba Kwadwo Aduse Poku Nimako Jnr
0545029466
kwadusepoku@yahoo.com